... I don't know how much I could, or should, say, but... if asking me something might help sort out what's going on in your heart... I can try to answer.
[Firefly's arms drop from around Stelle's shoulders, but not to pull away. She still stays as close to the other girl as possible, still leans in to let that warmth linger between them, but her hands move down so that she can take one of Stelle's in both of hers, turning her palm upward like she's trying to examine it.]
I thought... you were the only one that could really understand me. We were both created for one sole purpose, and our humanity seemed to just be a side-effect. It was subtle, but... you began to change, when you were with us. Maybe not as much as you have now, but I could see it.
... I really admired you for it. I had a lot of trouble adapting when I wasn't in battle all the time, but you made it look so easy. [She laughs gently, one thumb tracing small lines across Stelle's gloved palm.] I think that's why we kind of clicked so well together. That's why... you were such a precious person to me, even back then.
[Pause. Her grip tightens on Stelle's, ever so slightly.]
One of the first things I could ever call a wish of mine was because of you. More than anything... I wished that we could have met just as we are now.
[She's glad they had that second chance. She'd been looking forward to it for so long. But it still hurts, in a way, knowing it came at the price of Stelle's memories.]
[She doesn't know what to say. Honestly, what can she say, to all that?
There are feelings that she's still kept buried and shrugged off. Bringing a sleeve to her eyes, she wipes whatever residual tears linger before smiling.]
Thank you. I think that... even if I still can't remember everything, I can still move forward and continue to make those choices that I won't regret.
[...]
...Hey, Firefly. Can I say something that's a little selfish?
[As much as she, too, wants to move forward, to keep moving on the path she hopes will lead her to the life she so desperately wants... she can't help but keep looking back, at the blood left in her wake.
... But she can't let herself linger on that. Not in this moment.]
Of course. You're always allowed to be a little selfish here.
[There's a hint of hesitation, but eventually she asks--]
Can I stay the night? [It isn't what she really wants to ask, but it's a start.] Usually I'd be working in the evenings, but I'm sure everyone'll understand if I close the doors and get myself resettled for one day.
[And to contrast, there's no hesitation at all from Firefly.]
Everyone's allowed to take some time to themselves, and with how these shifts in memories happen, I'm sure they'll understand. Besides...
[Now it's time for Firefly to hesitate, before she moves her hand again to thread her fingers through Stelle's.]
... Maybe it's selfish of me, but... I don't want to leave you tonight. Not after how shaken you looked when I first opened the door. So let me make you something warm to drink, and I can pull out a few blankets, and we can relax here until it's time to sleep, okay?
[Stelle's quiet for a moment but soon that all too familiar, soft smile settles on her face.
It's almost too tempting to lean into Firefly's touch, but... if she does that, she might wind up melting and saying the words that are really on her mind.]
[With the heavy cloud above them lifting a little, Firefly feels assured enough to let go of Stelle's hands and scurry off into the kitchen. This will call for some of the nice hot chocolate...
As she putters around, grabbing the fixings and a couple of mugs, she calls back out to Stelle.]
And don't worry about where you'll sleep tonight! I don't mind taking the couch, so you can stay in my room.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
no subject
... I don't know how much I could, or should, say, but... if asking me something might help sort out what's going on in your heart... I can try to answer.
no subject
[The question that she has is a terrifying one. It's not just about her old memories anymore, after all--]
How did you feel about me, back then?
no subject
I thought... you were the only one that could really understand me. We were both created for one sole purpose, and our humanity seemed to just be a side-effect. It was subtle, but... you began to change, when you were with us. Maybe not as much as you have now, but I could see it.
... I really admired you for it. I had a lot of trouble adapting when I wasn't in battle all the time, but you made it look so easy. [She laughs gently, one thumb tracing small lines across Stelle's gloved palm.] I think that's why we kind of clicked so well together. That's why... you were such a precious person to me, even back then.
[Pause. Her grip tightens on Stelle's, ever so slightly.]
One of the first things I could ever call a wish of mine was because of you. More than anything... I wished that we could have met just as we are now.
[She's glad they had that second chance. She'd been looking forward to it for so long. But it still hurts, in a way, knowing it came at the price of Stelle's memories.]
no subject
There are feelings that she's still kept buried and shrugged off. Bringing a sleeve to her eyes, she wipes whatever residual tears linger before smiling.]
Thank you. I think that... even if I still can't remember everything, I can still move forward and continue to make those choices that I won't regret.
[...]
...Hey, Firefly. Can I say something that's a little selfish?
no subject
And that's another reason I admire you so much.
[As much as she, too, wants to move forward, to keep moving on the path she hopes will lead her to the life she so desperately wants... she can't help but keep looking back, at the blood left in her wake.
... But she can't let herself linger on that. Not in this moment.]
Of course. You're always allowed to be a little selfish here.
no subject
[There's a hint of hesitation, but eventually she asks--]
Can I stay the night? [It isn't what she really wants to ask, but it's a start.] Usually I'd be working in the evenings, but I'm sure everyone'll understand if I close the doors and get myself resettled for one day.
no subject
[And to contrast, there's no hesitation at all from Firefly.]
Everyone's allowed to take some time to themselves, and with how these shifts in memories happen, I'm sure they'll understand. Besides...
[Now it's time for Firefly to hesitate, before she moves her hand again to thread her fingers through Stelle's.]
... Maybe it's selfish of me, but... I don't want to leave you tonight. Not after how shaken you looked when I first opened the door. So let me make you something warm to drink, and I can pull out a few blankets, and we can relax here until it's time to sleep, okay?
no subject
It's almost too tempting to lean into Firefly's touch, but... if she does that, she might wind up melting and saying the words that are really on her mind.]
Thanks. Should I find a place to sit?
[She's already taking her heels off...]
no subject
[With the heavy cloud above them lifting a little, Firefly feels assured enough to let go of Stelle's hands and scurry off into the kitchen. This will call for some of the nice hot chocolate...
As she putters around, grabbing the fixings and a couple of mugs, she calls back out to Stelle.]
And don't worry about where you'll sleep tonight! I don't mind taking the couch, so you can stay in my room.
no subject
[Stelle answers with a bit of a frown. Even if she's less shaken now that doesn't mean that she wants to sleep alone.]
We can share the bed.